What We Can Still Learn from Mr. Rogers

Like many people who grew up watching public television in the late 20th century, I was very fond of Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood.  He was a dear, gentle man whose life mission and ministry was to teach children how important they were, how to treat others, and how to use their imaginations to make their young lives even brighter.  He was the Real Deal.  Employees who began working for him in the early years were still on the payroll – as well as close friends – by the time he died in 2003.  Strangers would stop him on the street and tearfully share their stories of growing up with his show; sometimes he was the only one in their childhoods who ever told them they were important.

When I was an 18-year-old freshman college student I read in a TV Guide article that the first thing he did every morning when he arrived at his office was answer his fan mail personally.  So I decided to write to him, telling him how amazing I thought he was, the way he dedicated himself to building young people’s self-confidence when the rest of the television world was devoted to tearing it down in the name of profits.  I also commented on one of his books, You Are Special: Words of Wisdom for All Ages from a Beloved Neighbor, that I had found on sale that year in my university bookstore; he had written in the preface about his grandfather (who’s last name was McFeeley, and was also Mr. Rogers’ middle name – sound familiar?) and I shared my own feelings about my own grandfather.  Less than a week later arrived an envelope with a red trolley graphic in the upper left-hand corner.  He had sent a typed letter addressed to me and my comments personally, signed in blue ink!  I couldn’t have been more excited!  I laminated the letter so nothing could damage it. 

Years later I became an English teacher, eventually instructing everyone from seventh grade to 20-year-olds.  I loved decorating my classroom with posters dedicated to not only famous literature and their authors, but other influential personalities.  I was able to purchase a very nice poster of Mr. Rogers from his company, Family Communications (now known as The Fred Rogers Company) for only three dollars.  Naturally, many students asked, often on the first day of class, “Why do you have a poster of Mr. Rogers in here?”  I told them that he was one of my heroes; I then asked, “Do you remember what he said at the end of every single show?”  I’ll never forget when one 8th grader guessed, “Don’t do drugs…?”    I said, “No, he didn’t say that, but I’m willing to bet he’d advise it!”  I then reminded them of how he always reminded us that “I like you just the way you are; there is nobody in the world like you.”  I’ve talked about this with every age group I’ve worked with, and the reaction is always the same:  they all look down bashfully with the strangest little grins on their faces while the message sinks in.  Who doesn’t want to be told they’re special?  (Incidentally, I was teaching those eighth graders the day of his death; long before the first class began several of them tore into my classroom: “Mr. Rogers died!!  I heard it on the news this morning and thought of you!”)

Which brings me to my list – What We Can Still Learn (as Children or Adults) from Mister Fred Rogers:

1.  You are special just the way you are. Fred Rogers wholeheartedly, unabashedly, completely believed this about everyone.  And the way he treated every person he met was living proof.  He once befriended a limo driver (although I can’t picture him riding in a limousine!) and spent that evening with him and his family, visiting and playing piano and singing songs.  Most people can barely recall what their driver looked like.

2.  Imagination is King (Friday!). What would Mr. Rogers’ world be without the Neighborhood of Make-Believe?  Well, I could have done without Lady Elaine Fairchilde – she was a big meanie who gave me nightmares.  

3.  It’s okay to feel bad. Is there anything worse when you feel upset, whether sad or angry, and someone tells you not to feel that way?  That just gets me even more irate.  Mr. Rogers taught us that it’s okay to feel whatever feeling you’re having; it’s how you ACT on those feelings that matters.

4.  You are not alone. Everybody feels sadness, anger, loneliness, happiness, joy, sorrow, and everything else, at one time or another.

5.  We’re all equal, and we all deserve to be treated that way.

Mr. Rogers says farewell to the adults who grew up with him:

If you’re a Mr. Rogers’ softie like me, you’re sure to love Tom Junod’s EXCELLENT article Can You Say Hero?

Also good is a TIME magazine article titled I Was Mr. Rogers’ Neighbor.

Mr. Rogers and Me, a documentary.

I also encourage you and/or your children to visit the Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood site on PBSkids.org – It’s so CUTE!!!!

There was once a movement on Facebook to save Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood from being pulled from PBS, but it wasn’t really true.  What IS true, however, is that it’s the decision of each independent PBS channel to decide to show it.  My local network, Prairie Public Television, wasn’t showing the Neighborhood for some time; now it’s on early Sunday morning, but that is all.  He used to be on at least once a day!  If you live in the PPT viewing area, I encourage you to contact them and suggest that Mr. Rogers’ message be able to reach our children on a regular basis. 

I’d love to hear your Mr. Rogers memories!  Please share them here.